Kindergarten Sam

My Boy...

My Baby...

My little Sam I am...

How did this day creep up so quickly? 

I'm seriously at a loss of how to explain my emotions today.  

I really am mostly excited and happy to start this chapter in our lives, but I would be lying if I said I wasn't even the slightest bit sad and overwhelmed by it all.

THIS ^^^^^

Is how I still see my baby boy when I look at him.  

The sweet, innocent, always smiling, happy, precious, fun, flirty, energetic, perfect baby boy.  

When I think about how this baby boy of mine has now embarked upon his school days, it really begins to tug at my heart strings. 

Granted, I am super excited for the added ME time and new beginnings that have come my way...

BUT part of me still wants to be that stay-at-home mom I have been for the last 7 years.

It's what I know and who I am.

As I mentioned before, HERE, I often find myself wishing I had a pause button or rewind button for our life.  What I would give to go back to moments like this with my little ones... 

(Note: Please ignore my totally obnoxious baby talk.  We are all guilty of this right? Totally lame of me I know.)

I miss those sweet baby grins, coos, and giggles.

I miss the sweet smell of their baby skin.

I miss their cute kissable little toes.

I miss them being entirely dependent upon me.

Selfish right?

Who cares, EVERY mother out there totally gets what I am saying. 

We want our children to need us forever, but slowly their need for us begins to fade.

My baby boy just spent an entire day at school, without me. 

THAT, I think, is what is most difficult for me to take in.

With every year and every milestone that passes us by, my babies need me a little less and less.  

AND

IT'S SO HARD TO LET THEM GO!

Today we walked up to the school and without hesitation Sam walked right up to his classroom door, put his backpack at the front of the line, and took off to the playground.  There was absolutely NO hesitation in his step.  He was ready for this day.  He really acted like an old pro...

Cause ya know, he had watched sissy all year last year so he knew the drill and didn't even need my help.

That's slightly heartbreaking.

Now, I was totally that obnoxious picture taking mom this morning.

Totally obsessive and slightly over-board.

 Snapping pictures of every little step Sam took.  Every possible emotion I could capture.  I needed to remember this day.  It was important to me and to him.  I got some awesome pictures too...

Then my stupid computer decided it would so graciously delete every picture that I took today.

Weird thing is, it was only the pictures I took today... the couple hundred that I had taken prior to today were still there.  It just decided that this moment in time, this milestone of our life, is one that I didn't need to have documented.  

I cried.

Like a wee little baby I cried.

No, worse than that... I uncontrollably cried that really pathetic and embarrassing cry where you can't catch your breath and boogers are pouring out your nose.

Yep, That's the one.

My baby's first day of 

KINDERGARTEN

and all the pictures were gone.

If you ask me, that just plain old SUCKS!

I called up my sweet, beautiful, talented friend Shelley

(check out her blog HERE... Really, she's amazing)

to see if she knew how to get them back and she so graciously offered to bring her camera to the school for me when I picked him up to ensure that I was able to get at least SOME pictures from his first day.  I took my camera along too, but considering the events of the day I wasn't too trusting of it.

I'm SO GLAD that she did too cause she captured this VERY awesome, TOTALLY priceless, MOMENT OF A LIFETIME...

Brought to you courtesy of  Shelley @ House of Smiths

Yep, that's right!  

I'm just SO busy and really important.

"I'm kind of a big deal right now!"

See what I mean about talent? 

And she was even able to capture my "good" side...

By that I mean my right, NOT my rear I swear!

Okay, okay... Back to my boy.

I was able to get some pictures when I went to pick him up from school.  I made my way into the classroom in those last ten minutes and snapped a few shots of him enjoying his class and friends,

both old and new.  We lucked out and got Mrs. Wilkin for a teacher this year.  She was Brenna's teacher last year and we all just LOVE her.  Sam also has a couple of people he already knows in class with him as well. His buddy Jake was in his preschool class and also takes karate with him.  Sweet little Lexi is the daughter of a long time family friend of Bill's and now myself.  

Photo Courtesy of Shelley @ House of Smiths

Sam came home FULL of excitement.  He let me know that they get 3 recesses in Kindergarten (which was his favorite part) and that he got to eat breakfast for lunch.  

"Mom, you know those things that are like waffles, but they're NOT waffles and you dip them in syrup?"

That's what he had for lunch.

HE LOVES KINDERGARTEN!

We did however learn that he had a bit of a melt down at lunch.  Not really melt down I guess, but rather a bit of confusion... accompanied by his stubbornness. 

Sam insisted that I was coming to eat lunch with him.  He wouldn't sit with his class because he was going to sit with me. It took the teachers a bit to convince him it was okay to sit with his class and that I could sit with him when I showed up.

Unfortunately, I never showed up.

I never intended to eat lunch with him today... I was working.

At one point in the weeks leading up to school starting I had told Sam that it was cool that I would be working at his school because that meant that I would be able to come and eat lunch with him sometimes.  I didn't mean today AND I didn't mean everyday.

He, however, thought that is exactly what I meant.

We have since worked that little bit of misinformed information out and he seems to be understanding of the fact that I won't be eating with him on a daily basis.

Let's hope that tomorrow goes a bit more smooth for his teachers.

Photo Courtesy of Shelley @  House of Smiths

I love this boy more than words can express.  I'm proud of the little man he is becoming.  I am excited to continue to watch him grow, advance, and succeed in life.  I am HONORED to be his Mommy. 

I love you son, To the moon and back.

Xoxo

Here's to Kindergarten and many more milestones to come.