Today my baby turns five. It really is a bitter sweet day for me. I can't have anymore babies and so he will forever be my last. I want him to stay little. I miss that sweet baby smell, baby cries, and kissable little toes. Good thing I have sisters to help fill my baby hungriness with their little additions expected to arrive this summer. I can't wait.
Back to my boy. As much as I want him to stay my baby, he wants to be my baby too. I posted this on my facebook the other night, but I wanted to share it here too. Saturday we celebrated his birthday with friends and family. He had an Angry Birds birthday (more to come on that later) and he had so much fun. I sat back and watched him play with his friends and couldn't believe how big has gotten. That night after I settled into bed myself he came and climbed up next to me. He wrapped his perfect little arms around my neck, and held me tight. He said, "Mommy, I don't want to grow up. I don't want to turn five anymore, I want to be your baby forever..." There was just so much sincerety in his voice that made me have to hold back tears. I can't believe he is turning five. My baby, is not a baby...
Is it wrong for me to just want to pause time? To just want to keep him this age forever? I know it shouldn't make me sad to watch my children grow up into amazing little beings, but like I said it's really bitter sweet for me. All I could manage to choke out as I laid there holding him while he fell asleep was, "You will be my baby forever... no matter how old you get." And there he slept, curled up on my pillow, for the rest of the night. I held on to him tight that night and may or may not have shed a few tears while I fell to sleep.
Sam really is growing up into a sweet boy and I love the amount of love that he has for his family. Just yesterday a kid a school wasn't being too nice to his sister while we were waiting for school to start. He didn't even hesitate to stand up for her. I know that he will do anything for those he loves, no matter the cost. The loyalty he has to those he loves speaks volumes about the amazing man he is sure to become.
Happy Birthday our sweet, Sam I Am... We love you to the moon and back!
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